Not the ITC Blog: ITC SBMS launched

Wednesday, 1 April 2015

ITC SBMS launched

SBMS03

Privacy alert!
Today at 9:00AM the recently installed Smoke Break Monitoring System was activated. Through a number of skillfully hidden cameras smoking behaviour near the rear building entrance is being observed during opening hours. One of our MS-windows-hating-ubuntu-hacking-Steve-Jobs-groupies managed to find a open socket at the camera address: http://utwente.sbms.nl:8080
and managed to download a couple of frames before ICTS plugged the hole. Our hack team is however confident they will be able to spoof ICTS's best efforts and be able to retrieve more evidence in the near future. As the virtually undetectable cameras have yet to be found the FMT still hides behind plausible deniability. We have however noticed that the Dean's wife is no longer smoking in view of these cameras...

SMBS01

SBMS02

Oons ITC

Lyrics by Robbadour and the Doorman

Heel lang léên kwamen síe noar oons Twénte
‘N landmeet-klúbke met úutlaand studént’n,
Úut dat státige Délluft, woar ‘t vót moss
Kwam da vólk toen noar Éanske e klóst ….

Veur die gást’n was ‘t érst toch wa wénn’n -
Want ‘t kost tíed deez’ old’ stréek leer’n kénn’n
Wéuninglast’ war’n lég ja sie hóord’n z’ graag
Duutslaant’s gréns toch is vér van Den Háag ..

Twee glastóorn’s was n’ móoi onderkómm’n
‘t Gaf veul rúumte, moar ‘twódd rap te krap
Wánt studént’n bleev’n moar kóm’n
Van ’t kartéerwaerk lustt’n élkeen wa páp.

Toen wodd’n beslóott’n diréks wat te bóuwen,
Post-modérn en met ‘n fél roodpeers dak
’t wódd’n wat wóar al Éanske’s van hóll’n
Ons Éfteling zit kleurríek in het pák

Steurig móderner wódd’n ITĆ nu
Met modéllen, pixéls en ArcGÍS
Académisch gekrákeel, ie wéet wa
Oh met ÚT, dat géet ‘n keer mís ...

En wat héur’n wie letst in N’ Béiaard
ITC mut verkáss’n alwéer
’t wórdt heláas UT Dríenerloo cámpus
Dit spít oons als Éanske heel zéer ..!

ITC déur met ÚT, maa kíek uut !
Excellénce gekte mék ongezóond.
Kíek van hóog noar ‘d éerde, maar hól toch
Ok twee péut stevíg op de gróond ..!

Disclaimer

Resistance is futile. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely (non) coincidental. Void where prohibited. No animals were hurt in the creation of this blog. Some assembly required. List each check separately by bank number. Batteries not included. Contents may settle during shipment. Use only as directed. No other warranty expressed or implied. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Postage will be paid by addressee. Subject to approval. This is not an offer to sell securities. Apply only to affected area. May be too intense for some viewers. Do not stamp. Use other side for additional listings. For recreational use only. Do not disturb. All models over 18 years of age. If condition persists, consult your physician. No user-serviceable parts inside. Freshest if eaten before date on carton. Subject to change without notice. Times approximate. Simulated picture. No postage necessary if mailed in the United States. Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement. For off-road use only. As seen on TV. One size fits all. Many suitcases look alike. Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients. Colors may, in time, fade. We have sent the forms which seem to be right for you. Slippery when wet. For office use only. Not affiliated with the American Red Cross. Drop in any mailbox. Edited for television. Keep cool; process promptly. Post office will not deliver without postage. List was current at time of printing. Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward. Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform. At participating locations only. Not the Beatles. Penalty for private use. See label for sequence. Substantial penalty for early withdrawal. Do not write below this line. Falling rock. Lost ticket pays maximum rate. Your cancelled check is your receipt. Add toner. Place stamp here. Avoid contact with skin. Sanitized for your protection. Be sure each item is properly endorsed. Sign here without admitting guilt. Slightly higher west of the Mississippi. Employees and their families are not eligible. Beware of dog. Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show. Limited time offer, call now to insure prompt delivery. You must be present to win. No passes accepted for this engagement. No purchase necessary. Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton. Shading within a garment may occur. Use only in well-ventilated area. Keep away from fire or flame. Replace with same type. Approved for veterans. Booths for two or more. Check here if tax deductible. Some equipment shown is optional. Price does not include taxes. No Canadian coins. Not recommended for children. Prerecorded for this time zone. Reproduction strictly prohibited. No solicitors. No alcohol, dogs, or horses. No anchovies unless otherwise specified. Restaurant package, not for resale. List at least two alternate dates. First pull up, then pull down. Call toll free before digging. Driver does not carry cash. Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only. Record additional transactions on back of previous stub. Not the Beatles. Not the ITC News.

Wednesday, 1 April 2015

ITC SBMS launched

The Blog is still Alive!